Day it doesn't matter....

Life is not about where you begin....it's where you end up....

There is a journey that your life will take you on....you chose the direction you go.  Some paths may take you on an incredable journey unlike any other making your life feel more fulfilled than ever imagined...and sometimes you chose a path that makes you think that you might have gone in the wrong direction.  The thing you must remember is that we all make mistakes.  We all take wrong turns.  Another thing we must all remember is that it is our own footsteps leading us...so take those steps and turn them around. 
No matter what path you take you have the ability to make it right...you have the choice to decide where you end up.  Make it count. Make your life something you are proud of.  Only you have the ability to make your dreams a reality, and if they don't scare you...you aren't dreaming big enough.

Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo



Day 93.

Sometimes in life things happen where the blame gets pinned on someone who may or may not have done the "crime"   This is where you need to look around assess the situation and decide...is it right or is it wrong...this is for you and you only to decide.

Maybe it is from someone putting the blame on you for something you did not do...like, spill a glass of milk...(don't cry over spilled milk by the way...it's not becoming of you and if you are like me...your not a pretty faced cryer and yes...I do know cryer isn't a real word) annnnnnyways you feel the need to defend yourself and to prove you are right.  But in the end, whether they believe you or not the outcome is still the same...facts are facts...you didn't spill the milk. You know you didn't spill the milk...shouldn't that be what matters most. Believing in yourself is the only thing that will take you through life in strides.  Putting all your energy into proving to someone what you are saying is true or not can be very exhausting on a good day.

So if you know you didn't do it...state that fact and let it be...fate has a funny way of working things out the way they are suppose to...spilled milk or not...

If you aren't being honest I will tell you this....

Honesty is a very hard thing to come by in people now a days...and maybe in olden days too...I'm really not that old to know...but what I do know...is once you lie once...two things happen....the lie becomes bigger each time you tell it and the second thing is that it's hard to get someone to believe you again.  You will be like the boy who cried wolf.  Not only that you will probably carry that burden around with you for a very long time...


Day 90.

There is no HOPE....

This seems like it's getting off on the wrong foot when infact....it's a positive thought...

HOPE...is a feeling that you have when you feel like there is no answer or solution.  There is no HOPE for me....there is only knowing.  People say...I hope this works out....I hope I get good grades and the most common...I hope they get better.   When you think about it....and it really comes down to the facts....Hoping things work out s a choice you are making to avoid the situation...hoping you get good grades is like saying....well I want to but....maybe I won't try my hardest....and hoping someone gets better is like trying to control the tides....and good luck to the person trying to do that shinannigans.  Don't get me wrong...I like the idea of HOPE....but I would rather BELIEVE.  I know I'm gonna do well on the test because I'm going to make sure of it...I will believe in myself...I know this will work out....because I am going to make sure of it....Being sick I believe needs a positive experience and attitude to get better...when you believe that you want to make it though and you believe you want to hold on...your body can produce miracles....I've seen it....I have seen someone hold on longer than expected and let go when they felt they were ready. 

KNOWING is what will get you places in life....know what you are doing is powerful...and you control that power....imajine....you have the ability to control your world.....AMAZING....what an amazing feeling knowing is....


Day 89.

Look forward....Don't look back...it's not the direction you are going.....


Day 88.

I want to apologize in advance for my lack of posting....It's been some time now....since my last post..mostly because I no longer have 24/7 Internet access.  However today my post will be amazing for those of you who have been waiting for some inspiration. 
So Here it goes....the Pursuit of Happiness....

Everyone has bad days...everyone has ups and downs, highs and lows, ins and outs....but the main thing is that you keep moving forward. Keep looking beyond the storm clouds and into the great unknown.  Keep your head high your steps steady. 

There is a goal in this world we are all striving for and that is to live...each and everyday in complete happiness.  In order to do this you have to pursue it.  It is not going to come to you easily...even the luckiest people have to work for happiness sometimes.  The pursuit of Happiness is a journey no one else can make for you...nor would you want them to.  Only YOU know where you are in the moments when your smile lights up a room, your laughter echos the walls and your heart beats louder than a drum....Keep those moments with you always....cherish them hold them and never let them go.  In moments when the world seems like it's falling around you...stop close your eyes....look...find those moments.  Pursue your Happiness. 

Memories are only there if you make them....they will only last if you chose to remember them.  Moments are just that...seconds....split seconds....moments....before they are gone.  Life...is a one time deal....you either make the most of it, or you don't....there's no back tracking.  You can't say opps....forgot to make that moment count....I better turn back time and do that again. (unless you have a time machine, and if you do....one.....why aren't you showing it to the world you genius mastermind you...and two....if you aren't going to share you should at least sell trips for obscene amounts of money so you can roll in it later - but I should get a free trip since it's my idea)  You have one chance....one single chance to find your happiness in life....don't lose it....don't let it go....don't walk away...don't listen to anyone else to make it happen....just make it happen....make it happen today tomorrow and every day after.  Make it Happen !

I want to share with you all that I have a disorder....called panic disorder...I've struggled with it for many many many years...makes me do some crazy things sometimes...sometimes it doesn't show for years...other times it's day after day...I use to think it was impossible to get out of a panic attack alone.  I use to think I could never overcome the sensation...and sometimes I still think that way...but lately...I've had someone show me....just how strong I am and how I don't need to have anyone else believe in me but me....I can control my body my happiness, my disorder....in good ways.  I don't know if that was their intention to show me I can...by leaving me to my own dismay....but they did.  Amazingly....they did.  You want to know my secret....I pursue my Happiness.....

The fact of life is....what doesn't kill you...( which trust me when I say there are plenty of painful heart breaking moments that you think might)  MAKES YOU STRONGER....even in your weakest moments....you have strength. Find your courage....give yourself the strength to dust yourself off (especially after you fail at making your time machine work and it blows up in your face...kidding......seriously I'm kidding...please still take me if it works) and try again.  In order to succeed in life you first must try...because deciding not to try is failing before you even take a step...positive thinking can take you to places you never dreamt possible 


Day 32.

Nothing beats a good chat with an old friend...no matter how much you THINK you don't need anyone...a friend....a true friend...can always brighten your day....

They always know how to make you smile and perhaps pee your pants with laughter.  They will be there even when you think that they don't want to be...they do....

Friendship is so important.  True friends are hard to find...but when you do...don't shut them out...because they may be just what you need to make your day...that much better

Hellllo Merchant...
Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo


Day 31.

Rescue me..

Years ago I use to look for people to rescue me..help me all the time....not because I couldn't do it but because I didn't have enough trust in myself to.   I played the sad fiddle...the poor me cards...some people took the bate....others did not...

I would get into a depression and look for anyone to explain to me why I shouldn't be there...because I didn't feel as though I was worth it,  I needed reassurance.  I would blame others for why I was there....they treated me badly...they were cruel hearted...and so on.  It wasn't their fault at all....it was mine. 

I thought I wasn't worth it....I thought I didn't deserve it.....they might have helped to plant those seeds in my head...but I made them grow and in reality...WHO ARE YOU to tell me I am worth it or not?  WHO ARE YOU to think that you are better than me?  Really  WHO ARE YOU...step back....look in the mirror...what gives you the right to judge me?

Excuse the cliche but...who died and made you king?    I'm worth it all right...I owe it to myself to have a life....and now to my kids..and later to someone who will love me....who died and made you king?

Be kind hearted ...  don't judge .... and just LOVE yourself and the world and people around you...

Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo


Day 30.

Letting Go....

Let go of the things that can no longer be fixed.  Holding on is being brave but sometimes moving on make you even tougher...

Letting go of the negative....from a standpoint (resource found online)

The human mind is an incredible story teller. It can make a dramatic story out of the most ordinary situations in life. If you just sit for a while, without doing anything actively, you will notice the mind spinning stories about your past, your future and your present. The mind is particularly addicted to the past, because the past usually gives you a sense of “identity”. It’s difficult for most people to let go of their past because they derive a sense of who they are from it, which is inherently a dysfunctional state of being. Clinging to your past will ensure that your future carries the same “essence”, and your life appears to be moving in circles with nothing new or creative coming in. In this article we give you pointers and insights on how to let go of your past and allow life to bring up a refreshing future.

Stop Defining Yourself Based on Your Past

It’s an unconscious habit that you picked up as a child, you started defining yourself based on “what happened” to you. For example, if you got low marks in a class and were reprimanded for it, you might define yourself as being an average student or a failure. That’s how the mind works, it just labels everything including you. Most adults are still defining themselves based on what happened to them in the past. This is a highly dysfunctional way of living life, because life will bring you a reflection of what you think you are.
A new way of living, is to stop defining yourself at all. Why do you need to define yourself? There is no rule book which says that you need to define who you are to live your life. In fact, life moves on in a smooth manner when you don’t live in your past by defining yourself through the events that happened to you. Always die to this moment, which does not need any definition from you. You can just “be” without needing to “know” anything. Allow life to bring you the knowing as and when it’s needed.

Know Deeply that Life is Always This Moment

It’s so simple and yet most people don’t get it, that life is always just the “now”. There is no past or future in life, just this one moment called the now. Life is timeless; the mind creates time by going into memory or by projecting from memory. One can live surrendered to the now, and life will moves effortless forward bringing forth all the comfort and well-being that is needed for the body. Feel free to let go of your ghosts for they have no value in the now which is always fresh and new.
Nisargadatta Maharaj used to say “When you board a train, would you still carry your luggage on your head or would you rather put it down and enjoy the journey”. Sadly, most people don’t understand that life is “kinetic”, it’s always moving forward, it does not need your past stories and it does not need you to keep the burden of your past identity alive. Let go into the stream of life and it will take you places, you will find that life is never dull when you are not defining each moment from the past.

No Story, No Suffering

Adyashanti, a well known spiritual teacher, talks about the state of living free of the stories of the mind, and how it liberates the being from suffering. You have the choice to ignore the mind. You don’t have to give it attention every time it pops up with a story. Most people never exercise this choice and they just allow their mind to grab their attention with every thought that it creates. When you allow this happen, you are at the mercy of the mind, and thus you can never let go of the past because you keep renewing it with your attention.
Letting go of the mind and letting go of the past is essential the same thing. The mind inherently operates from the past. So how does one let go of the mind? It’s simple, stop paying attention to it no matter how cunningly it tries to grab your attention. The mind will try all types of strategies to get your attention, but if you simply stay in an alertness, you will not fall for it. With time, the mind will slow down, and become very silent. When you become free of the mind, you will also become free of your past and your stories about yourself. Life doesn’t need any stories to move forward.

In Conclusion

You have to ask yourself if you are willing to be “fresh” to life, if you are willing to let go of identities and stories. Most people want to let go of their past, but want to retain their identity which comes from the past – this is not possible. You have to let go of your identities, and be willing to come completely fresh to life, in a very innocent way. Life doesn’t need anything from you expect that you stay free of the “stories” and just let go into the stream of existence. When you live life this way, everyday will be fresh, and it will bring joy and abundance like you have never experienced before.

Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo


Day 29.

You don't have to prove to anyone that what you are saying is truth or fiction.  If in your heart you know and believe it's true...that is all that matters...People may judge you and think they know who you are based on prejudice but at the end of the day...what you know in your heart is what matters.

They can call you down and make you feel poorly about yourself if you let them....IF you let them...so don't....They can call you a liar for a truth you are stating...but that doesn't matter because YOU know that you are telling the truth.  They can make their own conclusion based on hearsay or not having all the facts...but at the end of the day...when all is said and done...the only person that can make you feel like you are not truthful to yourself is YOU...

There's trend here...to most my posts...it all starts and ends with you...be your own kind of beautiful...

Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo


Day 28.

Today, tomorrow and your yesterdays, let go of all the anger...the torment and the hurt that you or someone else has burdened you with.  Amazing things will happen.  Trust in yourself and know that it will all work out the way it is suppose to.  Fate will lead you in.  Know that some of the greats things in life...aren't really things at all...

Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo


Day 27.

Never judge a book by it's cover...

As yesterday's post was much about judging yourself and others from their past I want you to also know...never to judge a book by it's cover...beauty is only skin deep as is compassion, love and kindness...these are all things you can't see at a first glance of the latest paperback or hard ass....opps I mean hard cover...

The world is becoming better at accepting differences, and personal style and expression.  I mean years ago there was much more racism and prejudice...and sadly there still is more than needed...but like I said getting better...nothing happens overnight right?

As an artistic person I went through many fazes of "outer skin"...from all black clothing to baggy clothes to maybe too tight and revealing...but the end result was me...same as always no changes made.  I was still polite and respected my elders, I still sang songs in the shower and I was still me...Heather...No matter what...if I decided to piece everything on my body that I possibly could and tattoo every inch...to dye my hair every color of the rainbow...I'd still be me...My cover might change...but the book I'm writing has not...the past chapters are still the same...only with more outer self expression.

You're not a thief because you wear baggy clothes and carry around bags...you're not a pot head because you listen to a musician that does it or because you hang out late at nights.  You are an outer expression of yourself a canvas to create...to dress for success of your own mind....embrace it...and let no one take away your cover....

Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo


Day 26.

Today's post is a bit of a ramble and may be a tad all over the place...but I hope you get my point.

Who are you?  Really....who are you?

Your past helps determined that...there may be some things you wish you hadn't done...but without them would you really be who you are today?

Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind comes to mind when I think about my past...If someone can look at me and judge me for what I have done or gone through when I have already judged and ridiculed myself for those things then really they don't matter.  Acceptance is the highest form of kindness that anyone can give...

I don't care who you are...where you come from...what you did...as long as you can right your wrongs and make peace then that's all I need to know.

People make mistakes...and should be given a second chance.  Obviously if it continues to be a "mistake" it's not a mistake at all it's a sign of disrespect or misguidance and needs to be removed from your life until it's adjusted or corrected, but....in the end...we are all human...all looking for someone to love us for who we are...and for our past as well....because...well....that's who we are...

You must learn to accept yourself and your past....before anyone else can...remember that.

Peace, Love, Luck & Laughter...xo